


I Kind Of Remember You but I Don't Like You

by TheNerdGun



Series: Reincarnation Au drabbles [1]
Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Gen, crack in the highest form
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-29
Updated: 2019-03-29
Packaged: 2019-12-26 02:32:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18274001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheNerdGun/pseuds/TheNerdGun
Summary: Reincarnation AU! where your memories randomly blank out at some point in your past life, and Kaneki can't remember anything past Mutsuki popping up at :re right before it closes down.





	I Kind Of Remember You but I Don't Like You

**Author's Note:**

> this is shit but i found the idea so fucking funny sjdfhlkjfl ignore this i wrote it while procrastinating studying circuits for my ap physics exam

"You!" Kaneki's head snaps up when he hears a familiar voice scream, and the moment he sees green hair he bolts up.

"Nope," he turns around. Probably a bad idea, since last he can remember Mutsuki quite literally had him at the top of his  _"To Kill"_ list. "I refuse. Come back when I don't have to deal with the bitch boy known as Urie Kuki."

Urie, who had been in a conversation with Higemaru, looks up. He glances at Mutsuki and shrugs, staring Kaneki in the eyes as he continues his conversation. That  _asshole_. Touka, who's right next to Urie, laughs.

"Oh my god," Hide laughs from behind the counter, "the kid didn't even say anything to you, why are you attacking him?" He's scolding Kaneki, but he also looks five seconds away from dying of laughter, so Kaneki's pretty sure he isn't actually trying to scold him. Maybe. Probably.

Aura raises a hand. "What the fuck is going on." He says, not questions, because, to be fair, there's not much to question. (He tells that to Urie later, who argues that the fact that Sasaki Haise calling him a bitch boy is pretty questionable, as well as how he got color back into his dead hair. Kaneki smacks him upside the head and calls him disrespectful. Urie looks accomplished. Touka's just sitting there watching her pseudo-adoptive child and her husband argue like children).

"Life!" Urie calls out from his conversation with Higemaru, who's now staring at Mutsuki like he's grown a second head.

Mutsuki nods like that's an acceptable answer, and Kaneki can  _hear_ Hide collapse onto the counter. He thinks he might have to plan out two funerals today, because Touka also looks like she's struggling to breathe. For the moment, though, he doesn't give a flying  _fuck_ about whether his wife and best friend are dying, and so he stands up.

"I'm not dealing with this," he repeats, "goodbye." Kaneki bolts out the door, and he belatedly thinks he can hear Urie's chair move against the ground and Higemaru's laughter echoing in the shop, but that doesn't matter because he's been 100% done with all this bullshit since before he even became a ghoul in his past life, so it's not like he actually cares about anything anymore.

(Touka calls him overdramatic, sometimes, because of his lax, "fuck all" approach to anything having to do with his past life, but it's not like she can complain. The two of them saw Mado Kureo the other day and Touka took one look at him before saying "fuck this shit I'm out" and turning around. Hinami, who was also with them, nodded three times before following Touka. Mado stopped Kaneki and tried to have an honest-to-god conversation with him. He regretted not following his lovely wife and his daughter sooner.

Urie, on the other hand, has taken to the option of making his personality take a total 360 from when Kaneki last remembers it. Touka says that Urie acts different, too, and she remembers quite a bit after the CCG disbanded, so Kaneki's inclined to believe her. Apparently, though, Urie's always been gay, which is something nice to learn about Urie, since the only two things that he remembers from before is that Urie lusted after a promotion and that he wanted Kaneki dead as well. Honestly, thank  _fuck_ Urie remembers more past the CCG, because if he didn't then Kaneki probably wouldn't have another child. Urie's a dick, but he's  _Kaneki's_ dick. Not like that, he makes sure to explain to Hide when the asshole tries to make what he says sound kinky.)

Kaneki doesn't stop running until he's far,  _far_ away from the coffee shop, and by that he means he's in Nishiki's garage, and is probably going to get his ass beat later. None of that matters when Urie strides in, though, because he can't just have a break down in front of his child.

He leans casually against the wall. "Hey," he winks, "you come here often?"

"You have me saved in your phone as "my cookie son," don't you  _dare_ try to flirt with me." Urie rolls his eyes, and Kaneki hates that he has a point. "Mutsuki says sorry for trying to kill you, like, five times, by the way."

Kaneki nods. "Damn, five? I thought it was like, less. Maybe four."

"Whatever the times, it was more than zero, and I maybe sort of left him alone with Hide, Higemaru, and Touka. I think mom might try and kill him if he says anything," Urie shrugs, "but I mean, that's just life, I guess."

"It be like that," Kaneki says solemnly, to which Urie responds with a simple, "it really do."

**Author's Note:**

> you can Tell that i haven't finished the tg manga but like, the idea of mutsuki seeing a reincarnated kaneki and kaneki seeing him and being like "fuck this shit im out" is to fuckiung great


End file.
